Reply To: Honesty vs popularity
There are many times when being honest is more important than being well-liked. Speaking honestly – whether with family, friends, or society at large – takes a certain kind of bravery. It comes with the risk that your truth may be rejected or poorly received, which can foster conflict or bad feelings. This is something Martha experienced on multiple occasions.
I noted that Ephraim wasn’t always supportive of Martha’s blunt honesty. For instance, when she calls North a rapist in his own courtroom, Ephraim chastises her afterward, saying, “That was reckless, Martha. That was dangerous.” He cautions her that it is better to be prudent and measured in her speech. She reacts by shouting that she spoke the truth. But there do end up being dangerous consequences for them both, just as Ephraim said. North sends Ephraim out surveying, putting Ephraim’s life at risk as well as risking Martha being able to testify at Rebecca’s trial. So the way you deliver the truth, and when you deliver the truth, can matter too.
The other aspect of this question implies that if you deliver the truth you will be less liked. I think it is possible in some cases to be truthful and be liked, but I guess it depends on the truth being told. In Martha’s case, she is aware that she is “miles away from charm,” but she is a truth teller and refuses to back down from speaking her mind. I think that’s necessary in her line of work because lives are at stake – the lives of the expectant mothers and the babies. So Martha needs to be honest for their health and safety. Being liked is not necessary in this situation. Being trusted is. Outside of her midwifery, however, this bluntness can hurt people’s feelings or anger them even if she is right (I’m thinking of Lidia, Clarrisa, Peggy). Her honesty can come across as judgmental, which I think makes some of the townsfolk take offence or be fearful. So, Martha does pay a bit of a personal cost for speaking the truth, but I think that many of the townsfolk know she has their best interests at heart.
