Reply To: Honesty vs popularity
Martha tells Ephraim that the townspeople don’t like her. Martha is literate. Her literacy puts her pretty much in a class by herself since women were not to be taught to read and write. Many of the women have resigned themselves to a life of illiteracy based on the misogynistic beliefs of the time. Because of this they probably fear what they don’t understand. Martha is a midwife, a mandated reporter to the courts concerning women who have children out of wedlock. She must report to the court the names of babies’ father’s if divulged to her during childbirth. As the person most likely to help with women’s reproductive health issues I imagine Martha was privy to other information that many would prefer didn’t become public. This might account for some of the ‘fear’ Ephraim refers to when he tells Martha he thinks the townspeople respect and maybe fear her. I suspect many women envy her and wish they could be like her but they just don’t know how to build a friendship with someone as strong and accomplished as Martha. If I am going to put my life and the life of my unborn child in the hands of someone I would pick knowledge and skills over friendship every day.
I cannot imagine that it is ever better to be liked than to be an honest person. Honesty and trust are fundamental building blocks for any strong relationship to develop and flourish. Relationships without these building blocks are very fragile and most of the time meaningless. In order to be true to myself I would not lie, be fake, cheat or pretend to be someone I am not for the sake of having friends. If that’s what it takes to be accepted and liked by people then they are not my tribe.
